Media Center Blog

Well it's my favorite time of the school year...
Sol's...
ugh ....NOT!
so naturally I'm here in the "Media Center" which is just another word for Library... and I'm taking my practice SOL...
Luckily my teacher is new to this whole concept and doesn't realize that the practice Sol's are past Sol's and that you can click this button and get the answer... and then answer the problem...
needless to say... I got a REALLY good grade.
=]
So I won the privileges of surfing the web.
so I thought I would grace my Blogger audience with my oh so exciting life....
hahaha
I'm a dork.
So I'm so excited for this weekend.
My parents will be in Pennsylvania visiting my dying great grandmothers... while I'm here with my friends... and my car.. step brother (who's over 21)n watching the house =]
PARTY TIME!
no I seriously doubt that ... but it will be fun to come and go whenever without having to ask my parents and just being with my friends all weekend...
It's kind of sad that I have to look forward to the freedom of going wherever whenever... but when you live with the kind of parents .... well step dad I do, it seems to take that kind of turn.
which is one of the reasons I'm way excited about Utah this summer!
along with seeing my family, my love, and having a great time RAY FREE!
=]
ugh life will be amazing.
also, working out daily, soccer, getting tan, and wave running add to the excitement as well.
=]
Oh man I can't wait.
we have like 32 days of school left =]
It's sad in a way but also exciting.
I will miss my friends this summer alot. and I'm afraid that we will all change so much and things won't be the same... but then there is a part of me that is saying.. "you retard they are your best friends it wont change."
so we will see.
I'm really excited to see Cameron.
I miss him alot.
It's been harder than ever lately because its getting closer and closer to the time I get to see him.
I really hope my aunt and uncle aren't Nazi about him coming to visit me in Provo, and about me going to stay with him in Idaho for a while... we will see.
They don't have legal guardianship over me... so technically I could do what I want... the only problem is... I don't want to ever disappoint them.
I'm sure it will all work out though =] My aunt Lori is pretty cool about those kinds of things... I mean they let Cameron come at like 3 in the morning the first time I ever met him, and Let me go on a date with him, so I'm pretty sure they will be cool with it.
The end of the school year is pretty much the only thing I have to look forward to right now.
Prom was 2 weeks ago... Wow was it really that long ago?
hmm yep it was.
It was alot of fun!
minus the fact that my hair looked like crap, and I didn't get as drunk as I wanted to... It was still lots of fun.
everyone looked amazing, and we have a million pictures to prove it. most of which all look the exact same only minor differences...We took ALOT of pictures.
Dancing was extremely fun! I danced with everyone! and my legs surprisingly didn't hurt afterwards... I think I have all those hours at the gym to thank for that =]
After prom was pretty fun too, for a little while. We only stayed like an hour.
There was SO MUCH FOOD!
then we went back to my house and got drunk... well everyone else did... I just got way buzzed. I spent the rest of my night/morning staying up with Stefan while he puked everything he had eaten and drank that night. That was awesome!
but yeah all in all it was alot of fun =]
I missed Cameron alot though, it will be good to have him here for Prom next year.
He's graduating this Friday =]
aw I'm so proud...
I don't think he really cares too much about it but I am excited for him.
I wish I was graduating....
but now he can get a job and work and get a house, and I can come stay with him in the summer.
It will be good.
He decided recently that he wants to go to Idaho state... which is awesome because that was on my list of schools to consider.... of course It's not like I have the GPA to get into any college I want...but I could get into Idaho state. =]
that would be cool.
Well I think I've blabbed about my non-eventful life long enough... plus the bell is about to ring.. I get to go turn in my tissues for extra credit in math class... because god knows I need all the extra credit I can get!!!
Ah Summer come soon!

Why do I have to complicate things?

Woman's nature...to want to be loved, and be told shes beautiful, the women always want to be with him all the time, and tell him everything because she knows that He will always care.....
Ugh I have that! why do I have to be so retarded! I seem to always turn the Mood from fun, happy, smiley.. to Sad, mad, and frustrated... and I know neither of us like that mood... who does?
but for some reason... I always have to make it that way!
I really don't mean to.
I don't even realize when it's happening... I just notice after the "bomb has been dropped".
Ugh
I just want it to be like it was before... I want my mind to stop steering into all these directions that it's been forced into before..
Just because the guys before lied, and only said things so I would be more vulnerable.. does not mean he is!
I know this!
why does my mind keep blowing everything out of proportion...
god...
I just need to be with him.

This place is in no way "Home".

I really cannot wait to leave this place... at all!

ugh! I don't understand why my parents decided to move back to this place!

The only good thing about here are my friends... If I didn't have them... you better believe I would not be here right now. I would be in Utah where I belong, and I would be able to see Cameron on weekends, I would be partying with Rick, and my cousins and my friends out there, and I would always have something to do!

Ugh! And best of all I wouldn't live with RAY!

god he is such an asshole!

seriously there are some days where I'm like "eh it will be alright to stay one more year" and then others where I wish tomorrow was graduation!

God I don't understand its just ridiculous!

He bitches to me about everything!

ugh

I'm still seriously thinking about moving to Utah this summer, like just staying out there... we will see though... I don't know I want to, but then I also will miss my friends terribly, and I wouldn't graduate with them... and I kind of want to graduate with the people I've known since I started school in this god awful place!

but then, I also want to leave here and be free, and see Cameron, and enjoy myself so much more, and not have to worry about stupid things! like "is my room clean enough for ray? Will ray get mad if i take the car here? don't let ray know I stopped somewhere else when I told him i was just going to pick up Caroline!!" Ughhh!

I cannot wait until I go to Utah this summer it will be the best vacation ever!

and this winter I plan on going to Idaho and staying all of break!

and then in the spring Cameron will come here for a few months and get his OWN apartment and by then I'll be 18 and I can legally move out for good, and we will stay in Loserburg until I graduate and then move out west to Idaho together and be happy and never have to come back ever <3>

Life will be so much better in 2009

ugh alcohol

Never in my life did I ever think my family could ruin the fun of getting drunk... well I was wrong... I have a full glass of Peach Schnopps mixed with some orange juice and I've only drank like 5 sips... my family has had their fair share and they made me never want to finish my glass...ever... ugh... I was downstairs watching the new episode of degrassi since Bre didnt want to come over, and there is nothing else to do.. I was casually sipping on my drink.. the episode ended so i decided to come upstairs and see who was online... well i come upstairs to my brother running to the bathroom with coke all over his mouth and chest my mom holding her crotch trying to run to her bathroom as she laughs hyserically and mcquaid screaming trying to go outside to pee off the porch the whole time rays sitting there with cards going "OH MY GOD WHAT A BUNCH OF IDIOTS" and of course its slurrred when he says it... ugh I want to leave.. they are soo annoying UGHH!!! and chad has to say hes hammerd every 6 min. god this is annoying... so im stricktly only drinking with my friends from now on...

4-11-08

It seems that I get worse and worse at writing in my blog. It could be the fact that my life really hasn't given me any reason to. It's April.. and As of now my life is mostly.. work, soccer games, school, talking to cameron, hanging with friends, and prom.. which is next weekend. and today I get to cross out all of those things because I am home sick. ... for the third day this week. ugh I hate throwing up its horrible.. and to make things worse my right boob hurts in this one spot and I don't understand why... Ugh but anyways I have a huge urge to go work out..but I can't even if I was healthy enough to I couldn't because My car has just been towed to get the whole steering column replaced... and to think it all started with a rejection sticker due to my air bag light never going off.... uhhh luckily though, i don't have to pay for it.. which surprises me because lately I've had to pay for everything! oh well.. I think after prom is over it wont be so stressful to make sure i have lots of money in the bank. I'm also saving for my trip to Utah as well.. Ive got like $235.00 and some change.. which is decent... it would be Way better if I had been saving all year like I said I would... oh well I'll just have to stick some tips in there too. anyways So I can't talk to Cameron until Monday night.. which is weird because we've never gone a day without talking.... ever... since like July... its weird and honestly it's not really weird until its like 11 at night because that's when I'm ALWAYS on the phone with him.. and now I just read and go to bed.. but I'm living obviously and its not that hard. plus I'm excited to hear about his trip when he gets back. He went to Utah to this place called "5-mile" and its an ATV trail that goes for five miles.. (go figure) and they go up there every year and spend a few days camping out and stuff. I think it sounds like tons of fun! He said he'd take me one year =] but yeah.. I would have to get good at riding first... Man I'm so ready for summer... school pisses me off. and I need to leave Lynchburg... ugh I want to run every morning and night with my aunt, I want to go wave running at Yuba lake, I want to play soccer On the perfect green grass in front of the temple with my cousins, I want to hike up to the "Y" on the mountain.. ugh and I want to see Cameron! man this summer will be sooo amazing! wow I'm completely rambling this blog entry has no meaning... and honestly I'm tired of typing... so this is the end... it had to come sooner or later right?